giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
