The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize