I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
