i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I forget how to act sober
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
