Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize