Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
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