hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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