The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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