Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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