The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
