My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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