Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
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