1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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