i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize