you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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