you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
