I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
