didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
one two three fourrrrnication!
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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