By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize