then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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