your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Farmville is her only friend.
I understand Curling. That high.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize