I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
