dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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