Banned from zoo.
Again?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
