3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
