Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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