I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
