I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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