Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
my poor anus
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
