come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
