You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Randomize