And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
