Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
