Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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