hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
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