I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
