D3 body, D1 cock
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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