Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
