college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
