Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize