spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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