I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
