I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
