my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
ugly people sure do ruin things
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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