We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize