what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
