I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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