I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize