Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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