Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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