I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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