He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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