Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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